The Boneyard (Mu-Arishi)

Mira tracks Royquin down to the bar he frequents the most. The Jolly Bones, as it's called, the one and only pub this part of the Necropolis's outskirts. Overall, a pretty laid back place for those still of worldly desires, it gets a steady clientele from the colorful types of people who gather in the unusual little nation that is the Boneyard.

Upon entering, the smooth sound of jazz reaches Mira's ears, playing from the bar's jukebox. It's an old but well-maintained and beloved machine by the locals, despite better technology having been present for decades. A first edition jukebox, at that, the pride of the Jolly Bones' owner and main barkeeper, Randy Altomet.

Randy himself is a former Legend of the Crimson Age, one of the few who had never wanted such power and preferred to live a quiet life. Though now one of the sentient undead, Randy is plenty content with the fact he received his wish. Upon noticing Mira enter, he turns over to one of the few people in the bar at this time. "Hey, Roy, Mira's here."

Royquin, seated at the bar counter, sighs before taking a swig from the bottle of rum in his hand as she approaches. "Are you here to lecture me again?"

Aedon stretches, rising from his seat at his loom. It's habit from when he was still alive, before he was just pure bones. Now he doesn't feel anything from stretching, but he never really kicked the habit. He leaves his small home in the Boneyard and begins a steady pace towards a secluded but spacious area of it. He often calls out casual greetings to those he passes, having lived here for some centuries.

It takes her a small while, since he had a head start ahead of her and as tired as she is. But even without detecting him, she knew where he would be at this point either way. She approaches The Jolly Bones. Mira smiles faintly, sitting beside him "Would it do any good?" She questions, more rhetorically than anything else. She had expressed her concern of how much he had been drinking before. But she was relieved that he could still at least function. Resting her bandaged hands in her lap she does something she has never done before with Roy here. She raises her hand a little to the bartender "Excuse me, Randy.. I'm sorry. I don't know what to get here... But something sweeter with Rum would be nice" She says, with a smile to the bartender.

-

Ragnora, meanwhile. Looks to Luex. Her face very serious "Luex... I felt that, there's another one here isn't there now?" Not using any terms that would give a passing eavesdropper an idea what's going on. But she knows that Luex would get what she's talking about. The Phoenix "Things are changing in this world Luex. I have read much about the history of this world. That demon should not have been here, but was pulled here by sorcerers. I don't know what else might come forth from the foolishness of those who meddle in that which they don't understand. But I think I am ready.. I can't hide in the library forever. I will have to experience this world first hand. After we tend to this new matter, I would like to discuss establishing the Phoenix Knights here if that is acceptable with you?" She asks, straight to the point. Very determined about this one.

Luex nods, "I think its about time you went out into the world too. I do have some suggestions on the latter subject. On the former though, would you care to join the initiates for one last field trip? I'm sure we'll come across something familiar."

Ragnora smiles at him. Genuinely excited at the prospect. "I wouldn't miss it for the world." She sighs a little as she runs a hand through her hair, before taking off her helmet and tucking it under her arm. "When are we going on this field trip?" She inquires, recalling how exhausted the trainees were.

Luex says, "I'll be rudely waking them all up in the morning. Flight Leaves at 10 AM."

Ragnora laughs a little "How cruel... Well... I'd best get some rest as well then. Thank you, Luex" She says, respectfully. Waiting for his dismissal before she heads to her lodgings. Keeping her helmet tucked under her arm.

Royquin raises an eyebrow at Mira but chooses not to ask. Randy laughs, replying, "Sure thing, I'll see what I can whip up."

"...Well, as much as I'd like to get wasted per the usual this time of week, I've got other stuff to do tomorrow morning," Royquin remarks. "Though I hate Luex's choice of disguise," the scarred man says with a visible grimace.

Mira thanks Randy before chuckling a little bit "For someone trained in espionage, he certainly knows how to do his disguises doesn't he?" As she rests a little bit against the counter. Still tired from the battle. "It can be a little bit difficult sometimes, can't it?" She says, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "You know... It's strange, isn't it? It's been some time since the three of us were together" She says, contemplative "How old was Lura, the last time you saw her?" She asks, looking over at him with a small smile.

Royquin looks to his bottle in remembrance. "When she was just a small child. And I scarred her for life because of that bastard sealed inside of me."

He sighs, closing his eyes, leaning on his bottle. "I barely remembered the old days before I was sealed away. Those memories...they're hazy. Those days where it was just us five, travelling the world. It might've only been a few years for you... but that was millennia for me.

"Sometimes I wonder what could've happened if all of that never happened. If we had simply vanquished the Shadow and gone on with our lives in relative normalcy..."

He takes a swig from his rum as Randy comes by to give her request. "Whiskey and soda on ice. Not too hard on the tongue," the undead barkeeper remarked as goes to take another order as Royquin continues on.

"I just want to forget it all. I just want to forget all of those faces... those lives I've taken. I want to forget the fact my wife died because of me, and the fact I cheated on my first love. I don't want to forget the fact I had to bury the empty casket of my first son and the fast I was a terrible, negligent father to my second son. I just want to fucking forget everything."

Mira nods her head, looking to him while he speaks. Giving Randy a small smile in thanks but otherwise not breaking her silence while Roy is talking. She takes a small sip of her drink. Handling it quite well. "You know... Lura has grown up to become a wonderful young woman" She says, a smile still on her lips as she swirls her drink around in the glass a little bit. "Even though that the path we walked to give her life was paved with corpses. As much as we tried to prevent it"

Her smile gets a little bit softer as she continues "But despite that, I don't regret it. Travelling with everyone. It was very difficult. But we've accomplished so much doing it." She laughs, a very small bit "I tried, you know. Doing what you said. I took Lura, and actually built a farm and lived with her there. As much as I could, away from all of this. And we were happy" She says, taking another sip of her drink. "However, we seem to have a knack for finding trouble. I couldn't say out of it forever" As she uses her finger of her spare hand to toy with one of her locks of hair. "It got me thinking. I don't think it was right for me to try. Certainly, to raise Lura it was acceptable to step away. But... If we have the power to save lives, shouldn't we do everything we can to try? Some people shoulder the misfortune of those without power to give them a chance that they might not otherwise have"

She takes a bigger sip of her drink this time as she shakes her head a little bit "Roy... You're a good person. You have a heart larger than your chest, and an empathy that so many lack. You've taken it upon yourself to do what few others would in your stead" As she takes her hand out of her hair and smiles at him, a soft, sad smile. "But if you forgot about me, well... I would be very sad" She says, resting a hand gently on his shoulder "I have never once forgotten about any I have killed, nor the wrongs I've committed. I try to honor the memories by what I do today. And fighting onward with a certain heart." Her eyes darken a little as she recollects "I have bad memories as well. More than I would care to remember. But" And as she says but her eyes lighten again, a genuine happiness behind them "My memories with you and Luex are genuine. I treasure them even as I treasure you. You are a very close friend to me. And that is why when your heart weeps, I weep with you". She squeezes his shoulder, comfortingly. Though her grip at this moment is rather weak. "Whatever burden you shoulder, I will do everything I can to shoulder it with you. Your emotions, your pain, all of it. You do not need to find solace at the bottom of a glass or a tankard. You can find it in those close to you as well." She says, her voice quiet. For his ears alone, but all the more emotional. Her care is genuine and the reflection is clear. "You are not alone here... Not anymore"

Royquin remains silent for a moment. "...Mira. Have you ever shot a man in the back of the head because of who he was at birth? Did you ever smell the stench of hundreds of burning corpses... all of them, civilians? Have you ever seen a sky filled with hundreds of flying machines, raining death on whatever they flew over?

"I've seen it all. I've seen hundreds of bombers flying above cities, reducing them to rubble and ash. I've listened to the thundering of shells around me for ten days straight. I've witnessed a bomb so powerful it destroyed an entire city, and killed the hope of anyone returning there for decades. I've seen men torn to shreds by artillery, too wounded to live but still alive, screaming for his parents. I've felt the horror of poison gas washing over your comrades, that sense of dread as people scrambled to put on a gas mask before a horrific, cruel death."

He sighs, shaking his head. "Mira, don't get me wrong. I know you're willing to help... what I'm saying is, there's no way for you to understand what I've been through. And if you can't understand it... then you can't really shoulder it."

"I's what they call PTSD, Mira... Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. You don't move on from it... it doesn't go away... you learn to live with it. But ut never goes away. Even the smallest thing can trigger a flashback. Some nights, I listen to the roars of the artillery... the rumble of the bombers... the screams of the dying. I repeat it over and over and over again."

"And I'm starting to see it in Luex's eyes, too. He's becoming the same as me. A man whose mind and body has begun to hollow out from the tolls of the kind of shit that one man can do to another. I just pray that this demon doesn't come for you too, Mira."

Mira looks to Roy and shakes her head. "No, Roy.. I haven't shot anyone. Those weapons in this world do not exist in mine. However... I have myself killed thousands, perhaps even tens of thousands. Or more. Either because of who they were born as or who they became... When I was younger, and I had little control of my magic, to fight evil I lost control. When I came the budding city that I had lost control in was destroyed. The menace was dead, certainly... But so was what had to at least have been more than half of the population in the city. I knew that some of them died by him. But no doubt a fair number died by me... I have seen meteors fall from the sky by powerful mages to crush their opposition. I have seen the aftermath, the burning flesh, the scattered corpses and limbs. Great pillars of fire burning the world, and all those inhabit it, to ash before them".

She takes another sip of her drink "I have smelt the decay of corpses in the villages I could not save. I have seen pregnant mothers impaled with their children by raiders who wanted only money. I have seen people stricken by diseases that undead cruelty and ingenuity invented. Something that exists for the sole purpose of them dying a slow and agonizing death. Knowing that I had the magic and I knew how to heal so many things, but nothing worked on this. I had to comfort them while they drew their last breaths and all I could do was charm their bodies to ensure that they did not become resurrected." As she finishes her drink, pushing the glass gently away. "Their screams and cries as they withered away are still prevalent now. I have been in battles that have ripped apart continents with their ferocity. Battles between titans that millions have been murdered in. Civilians that had nothing to do with it were dragged into the battle. Those who could not do anything but give their lives in what they knew was a futile attempt to make a difference in something far beyond their scale"

"Roy... You are correct. I have not been in this world long. I haven't seen all the horrific things that the weapons of this world can do. But the weapons of... Well, our world. In some ways are far more atrocious than what this world has to offer. And I have been battling long enough to have seen almost all of it" As she sighs a little. Not standing, just staying sitting "But even then, I am not you. We have each seen our own horrors. However, if you wait expecting to have someone who is as down as you are, I believe as you are now the only thing you will succeed in doing is dragging each other down together... This is not living with it Roy. I will never forget the weight of the lives I've taken, or the lives I've seen taken from my inability to protect them. But pushing away any who want to try to help you because you believe they can't. I'm unfamiliar with PTSD, but with anything similar to it never once has the solution been to isolate yourself. You and Luex both attempt to shoulder the weight of the world on your own, and you are both mighty... But no matter how mighty one is, nobody can handle that weight"

"I know it is not so simple as that Roy. I am not foolish. I face my demons day by day. Every time I must add another life to the many I've taken... And today I added many. I understand how vampires are. Those were innocents who were turned against their will by those who seeked only to further their gain. Evil is everywhere... And even those who want nothing to do with it get dragged in, and I must face them in battle to protect those I hold dear" As she holds up her bandaged arm "I killed hundreds. And I pay for their lives with my blood. I live on for those I love. And I fight my demons to give them, and myself a brighter future. Because I have seen what Joys can come of living... And I have the power to keep them from experiencing the worst of the sorrows. This demon has come for me, if it is as you describe it... Perhaps on a lesser scale than you. But living on your own is no way to deal with anything. Even if someone cannot understand what you've gone through, you can live with them. Laugh with them. Walk or talk with them. Whether to enjoy life for yourself or in memory of those who you fight for. But sitting here, in a stool on your own, does nothing for them or yourself... Please, Roy. Saying it is not so easy and pushing away those who want to help is already giving up. It will never get better if you've already set your mind on the fact that you can't be helped. Don't lose hope Roy... Regardless of how well I Can shoulder everything you're experiencing, you're not alone anymore." She says, giving him a small, sad smile

Royquin was quiet for a few moments before speaking. "Mira, I don't mean to push you away. Or anyone else, but... please, let me ask you this... where were you last night?"

Mira continues to look at him. "Well... In the small amount of time I've been here, much of it has been spent reading about the history of this world, and the weapons it has developed. But last night was no exception. I was studying in the library" She says, resting against the counter a little bit. Her empty glass a good bit in front of her.

Royquin drops the empty bottle on the counter.

"I was staring at a mushroom cloud. The same one that killed 30,000 of my brothers-in-arms."

He looks back down at his bottle.

"They were the lucky ones. You've read up on radiation by now, right? The... 'invisible poison?'... That one took me centuries to recover." He sighs. "I know you've seen lots of the dead. We both have. Corpses, enough to make walls out of them. Every single night in my dreams I remember nothing but corpses, or men disguised as corpses, marching to their deaths. Every night I relive friends I've made in the past, killed because I couldn't do anything or I hesitated. Every night I wake up screaming or crying because of the fucking choices I made that ended up killing the people who relied on me to get them out alive.

"They were the lucky ones. How often have I seen soldiers return missing an arm, a leg, or a piece of their soul? Forever bound to a wheelchair or some menial work for the rest of their lives... too broken to live, too stubborn to die."

Royquin looks directly into Mira's eyes. His one good eye is filled with despair, the witness of thousands of battles, the murderer of millions.

"Mira, take the worst case of battlefield fatigue you've ever had or seen, and magnify it at least three times. That's today's standard. And it never leaves you until you die."

He gets up, suggesting he's returning to his apartment for some rest. "Yes, it takes bravery to live... but you need the energy to get up in the morning, to face the shit that life is going to throw at you. One of these days, I'm going to decide that I'm done dealing with this shit. One of these nights, I'm probably going to go to sleep and never wake up again."

Mira's eyes are the same as they've ever been. Calm, patient, and endlessly gentle. Strong and kind. She listens to him unblinkingly while he talks to her, and when he stands her warm hand takes ahold of his. "You won't..." She says, quietly. Though she stands as well, looking at him with an even face, no smile on her lips but her eyes are unchanged. "When we enter a battle... A war... A fight. When we are in charge of lives, two types of people emerge. Those who discard the lives beneath them, without compassion or empathy.. Or those on the opposite end of the coin, those who do everything they can to keep as many alive as they can. And when they can't, every life haunts them, and they rethink everything they could have done to keep them alive."

She squeezes his hand a little "You are one of the few I know who has seen everything that they have, and is still the ladder... I believe that to be strength, Roy. Your capacity is so great that even when its tearing you apart, you do everything you can to prevent what has happened before, reliving their deaths and shouldering it alone so that others may have a chance for life" She says as she guides him from the bar to give him a breath of air. And once they are outside Mira looks away from him and up at the sky. "It was under this same sky that I met you, Luex, and everyone. All my friends, all those I've lived with. All those I've laughed with... Even here, it is the same sky" She says thoughtfully. Looking back to him.

"I've never asked... What kind of woman did you give your heart to, Roy? What was she like?" Mira asks, wanting to change his train of thought as she releases his hand.

Royquin's silent for a moment. "Are you talking about May or Maria?"

He sighs, more softly than he did when recounting his usual past experiences of pain and regret. "...May. Well, she was always a feisty one... and the one who gave me immortality in the first place. Sometimes we quarreled, sure, but we'd always make up for it later.

"When you and Luex were doing your own thing, back then, we'd be off adventuring or solving problems. Even when my old friend Michael died, she was there for me. Calmed me down from that berserk fit I had."

Royquin looks to his left hand, gloved and hidden by long sleeves. Beneath, Mira knew; his left arm was lopped off in the past, and had to be reanimated with necromancy. All that remains of the arm is bone. "I wouldn't have survived if not for her. I owe her my life. I owe her my heart. And yet, here I am, damning her gift and staining my loyalty."

He shakes his head slowly, solemnly. "...Well, what's done is done. No point milling over it. As for Maria... well, how should I put it."

"Mira, she was your alter ego in that realm."

Mira listens to him describe May with a small smile on her face. Especially when he mentions her and Luex doing her own thing. That was certainly a tale. They had been doing their own thing, whatever that thing was, for a very long time now. She nodded sympathetically when he mentions calming down from a berserk fit. She doesn't respond when he mentions himself damning her gift. There's nothing that she could say that he didn't already know with that. He knew it better than she did. But when Roy mentions Maria she hesitates. Now she knew that she had to say something, and a lot of things came to mind. None of them would have been good to say.

She looks at him curiously "My Alter Ego, is it? How interesting... It's a shame I never had a chance to meet her" She says with a warm smile to Roy. The information doesn't seem to bother her at all. But as she says that she pauses and her smile fades for a moment, concern in her eyes as she asks "Then... Is it hard, to be around me?" She asks, her voice soft. "Please be honest with me Roy. I don't want to cause you any harm" She says. Her voice is genuine, as is her concern at the concept.

Royquin sighs. "...I'll admit, Mira. Sometimes it's difficult. But most of the time... I can cope. The two of you are very, very similar... that, there's no doubt. But at the same time there's certain differences I can rely on... like certain habits, or things that Maria used to say... At least I can remind myself that the two of you are ultimately still different people."

He shakes his head. "That's only when I'm right in the bloody head. If I'm having hallucinations or some other crazy fit... I can't say. I don't know what I could do. So Mira, please. For your family's sake especially. Be careful around me."

Mira nods her head as she listens to Roy, smiling at him softly "Roy... I'm not afraid of you" She says, her voice gentle and quiet "I know the real you, and I've known you to long to be afraid... I trust you". Her voice not drifting from its tone at all, nor is there the smallest bit of hesitation as she looks at him. "And, don't be afraid to come to me... If I can help, that is. I will always be happy to"

Royquin nods his head in thought. "I wish I had that confidence for myself, Mira. But, thank you. I'll be sure to remember that."

He sighs, rubbing his eyes. "I really need to grab some shut-eye. I'll talk to you later."

Mira smiles at him softly. "Well, that's what friends are for. I have enough confidence in you for the both of us"

But she nods her head "I think that's a good idea..." She hesitates before adding "Roy, I know your knowledge of alchemy and sleeping droughts. But if you'd like I can try with magic to ease your nightmares, if you'd allow it. I don't know how successful it would be, but I'd be willing to try. I'm almost certain I could find a way to help, if only a little" She seems reluctant for him to return to the sleep he described to her without doing anything